Thanks for your company. Today is a little bit of a show and tell version of me. Who am I? I’m sure as shit not Spiderman, that’s for damn sure. My name is Claire. I’m a country girl who used to be absolutely terrified of boys, men and scarecrows who showed male like tendencies.
I’ve changed since then, trust me. From a prude who was the only virgin at boarding school (more about that later) I now own and have read over twenty dedicated sex bibles. From “The Sex Diaries” by Bettina Arndt to “The Sexy Book of Sexy Sex” by Kristen Schaal and Rich Blomquist (A hilarious read if you’ve got a casual sunday arvo to waste) I tear through these books, relishing every new sex position, handy tip and interesting fact. After all, a well read girl is a sexy girl, particularly if she has just polished off “Good Porn for Women” on the train ride home. Now that is a good way to get some great attention ladies, just try not to hold these books aloft on pension day. Safe to say most Nanna’s of the world do not appreciate quite detailed instructions on how to use a swordfish as a sex toy (pictures included)
But my life doesn’t revolve around sex (completely) Sure I have just enrolled in what feels like a lifelong uni course to become an established sexologist, but there is more to me than just my dirty dirty mind.
I crave a beautiful relationship. After all I am 26, and although my wild oats aren’t germinating just yet, settling down with a man (preferably) is the end goal. Which is sort of what this blog is about. My dating ups and downs. Even though it usually takes going down to get something up 😉
I’ll start from the beginning, just so you can see how this strange strange journey began, and just maybe we’ll have a little fun along the way. I’m on three dating websites, on the lookout for “the one” or at least someone who’s pork sword doesn’t smell like stale corn chips (apparently that’s not normal)
So stay tuned, because the stories only get weirder!
Next time it’s back to school for the first kiss (not a great experience)