The Festival Of Really Good Sex!

Holy shitballs Lovers!

What a start to the festival! Not to mention my weekend!

I must say I had planned to save all my thoughts until after the festival and give you a really well thought out, pensive post, but after tonight the words are just exploding out of me! And let’s face it, explosive always trumps pensive, right?

So, you want to hear about it?

Thought so.

Oh Lovers, I was so excited (not to mention nervous) when I first arrived. I knew I’d be one of the only people attending solo, and for a while it appeared I was correct in my assumptions.

But then I noticed a few people trickle in one by one and my fears of not having a partner were cured.

I took a seat on one of the thousands of cushions scattered throughout the room (ok maybe not thousands, but seriously, if there’s a store called Cushion World, these guys had bought them out!)

Cushion chosen, I scoped the very warm room out. (A quick look at the aircon confirmed it was 30 degrees in the room.) Looked like they were following Nelly’s philosophy on life. It’s getting hot in here, so take of all your clothes!

Well, maybe not all of them, not yet anyway. I did shed multiple layers though in an attempt to keep my cantankerous sweat glands happy. (Honestly, a touch over 26 degrees and I’m sliding off chairs due to my drenched ass cheeks!)

Eventually though, everyone was settled and we began. Nothing too exciting really, just the usual housekeeping stuff. You know the type. Be quiet when you leave, smoke out the back and don’t take photo’s of naked people covered in lube sliding around on each other.

Pretty standard right?

Then we were given numbers and a consent sheet regarding our limits and where we didn’t want to be touched.

I pondered for a while. Would I be cool with all this touching?

Just kidding. There was no pondering. The answer was a very definite yes! I only wrote ‘maybe don’t shove a finger in my belly button’ so I’d fill the space.

Plus my belly button is kind of gross, so really I was doing them a favour.

Anyways, I was number 19, and had to sit and wait patiently for my number to be called.

It was like the sexiest Centrelink waiting room ever.

All this waiting gave me a chance to get chatting and I met quite a few pretty cool and interesting people. More on those peeps in further posts.

My number was up!

I was led into a small room and told by one of the volunteers to undress as much as I felt comfortable. I’d told myself I’d whip my shirt off but when I saw all the nakedness surrounding me I shrugged and slipped my bra off as well.

Freezing nipples leading the way (this room was certainly not as warm as the bikram chamber I had just emerged from) I was introduced to one of the male volunteers. I must say, it’s quite a strange feeling, standing in front of a fully clothed man wearing nothing more than your necklace and yoga pants. That’s probably the reason why I greeted him with a wink and a, ‘sup.’

Face palm.

Luckily at that point he blindfolded me and ended any chances of more white girl gangster talk occurring.

Now I was in it. The ‘Sensorium’ had begun!

The guy took my hands and slowly guided me down the hallway. I heard pulsing beats and rhythms as we continued forward and my heart fluttered with excitement. Of course I could have opened my eyes at any time and peeked out from the blindfold, but where’s the fun in that? No no, this was all about the feeling, not the seeing.

And boy did I feel!

The hands holding mine guided me for a few more steps before we came to a stop and they disappeared. For a moment I felt bereft. Those hands were all I had to cling onto in this new and nerve-wracking experience and they’d just abandoned me!

Those hands were quickly replaced by at least two new sets. I breathed in sharply as I felt at least four hands gently caress my arms, my neck, my torso and yep, my fun puppies.

It was so nice! The excitement of not knowing what would happen next, who was touching you and where they might lead you added an intense element to the whole thing. The hands withdrew again and this time were replaced by a… I have no idea actually. It could have been something wildly erotic, or it could have been a wooden spoon. That’s the joy of a blindfold!

I breathed deeply as whatever it was was traced all over my body before coming back to circle my nipples. All the while the pulsing music beat rapidly in the background, staccato drum beats keeping things tribal and intense. I heard a sharp smack and a startled groan as someone nearby received their own wooden spoon in a much more… direct manner. Whatever was happening, they were certainly enjoying it!

But I had no more time to think about them as I was now being guided to another section of the room by yet another set of hands. I stopped, as what felt like beads were guided gently over my skin. However they didn’t stay gentle for long.

Ooh, ah, goddam that stings!

My inner voice was screaming at me to stop this madness, to ask whoever was violently flaying my breasts to ease up and go back to the nice stuff. But no, I wanted to feel it all, the pain and the pleasure. So I stayed silent and took my boob punishment.

Go me.

After I survived the pap flogging, I was guided onward once again, this time not stopping until I could feel someone’s hot breath on my face. (It’s cool, they had nice fresh breath so I was more than happy with our proximity. The only part I felt bad about was perhaps my Hungry Jack’s dinner had made my own breath less than appealing.) Still, there was no time to think about mundane things like that, as a firm voice right next to my ear commanded me, “open wide.”

I did as I was bid, thinking I would receive a finger for my troubles, but instead got a nutella coated strawberry. Score!

“Bite, hard.”

Hey whatever you say lady, who am I to say no to a fresh breathed giver of chocolate fruit?

Before I had time to thank her for the offering a strong set of arms came around me from behind and held me tight. I could feel their whole body pressed up tight against me. Might have been a girl, might have been a guy. Don’t know, don’t care.

Whoever it was could certainly move! I loved the way they crushed me into their embrace as they ground into my back, swaying languorously with the music. Their hands slid all the way up and down my body, making me feel both incredibly erotic and yet surprisingly safe at the same time. It really made me realise the power and sexuality a body can wield.

I was certainly sad when he or she let me go, but as they say, all good things must come to an end!

And that was my first night at the festival of really good sex! Not too shabby eh? Now I really must go to bed as I have to be up at 7.30am to make it to the first class.

How I wish coffee breath was sexy!

Claire xx

Pick up line of the week: I’ve got Skittles in my mouth, wanna taste the rainbow?

 

 

 

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